Sunday, September 21, 2008

Hot Emesis Shower

So I posted this story on our old blog that had a melt down so I thought I would share it again....

This summer we were coming home from a family trip to the ice cream store when Courtney complained that she was not feeling well. This is a usual ploy by our children when they are trying to avoid chores or want to be carried up from the car. Seeing how Courtney is just as cute as her mom and the two of them almost always get what they want from me, I picked Courtney out of her seat and took her to the elevator. Something was a miss however. Instead of the customary wry smile of a little girl who knows her dad is wrapped around her finger, all I got on the way up were burps and moans.

Once we were out of the elevator Courtney announced that she was going to be sick, I looked back at Brittany and before I could grab the house keys from her, a hot, wet fluid began to spew against the wall behind me. It was like watching a war movie with the bullets pounding straight along the wall until, blast, man down. As the friendly fire continued past I could see the silloutte of my head and shoulders that had blocked the spray from reaching the wall, I'm hit, medic!

(Mind you, through all this I never dropped the child, a little props here mom). When I looked back at Courtney her eyes were huge, partly from the surprise of being sick and I think also partly from expecting a tongue lashing from dad, I would never. It was then that I noticed the chipmunk appearance of her cheeks. The sweet little princess had been able to stop mid-stream and was now holding back a mouthful of putrid from further covering dad. Moments like this let you know how much your kids truly love you, I'll never be able to trump this in the "I love you so much I would..." game. We ran over to the railing and Courtney fertilized the shrubs below.

Mom grabbed Court and dad undressed faster than on a Friday night without kids and ran into the shower. Have you ever seen the part on Ace Ventura after Ace found out the Police Chief Lady was really the "Laces Out" dude, well then I need not describe the shower scene.

All men eventually need to be baptized into fatherhood, just hopefully not by hot emesis.

6 comments:

The Chaparro Family said...

So we're the first to comment on your new, really cute, blog! It looks great! I love the story, Gabe has been thrown up on plenty of times, myself only a few, but our kids aren't kind enough to stop mid stream, how cute.

Ashley said...

Hey guys! Loved this story. Tyson-you should considered switching professions. You're a great writer. I'm sure Brit would love that!

brit.brat said...

love it. thanks for sharing.. and i'm so excited to check up on you on here!! thanks for keeping us updated. :D

Jill said...

I love the blog! Thanks for sending me the link. Here is the link to mine.

http://jilliciousj.blogspot.com/

Have a great Tuesday! Love Jill

The Woodlands said...

This is disgusting...and astounding, and full of LOVE! You rfamily is the best :o)
So glad that you have your blog here now so that we can peruse it from ours!
~M&K

Rene Potter said...

Oh my gosh what a stellar dad. That is a new definition of love on Courtney's part...so gross, yet so sweet. =) The beautiful blond Reisenbergs are here!!!